There’s nothing wrong with wanting a mate, someone you can spend a lifetime with. It can be wonderful to have someone to love, hold and cherish. The problem arises when you start depending on your mate to help you heal your childhood wounds, and make you happy or whole.

Way before Cinderella, and her wimpy ilk, waited for a prince to rescue them from their misery, women have been looking to a man to make them happy.

Indian culture (and Bollywood movies) also perpetuated the Pati-Parmeshwar myth - that a woman should look up to her husband as “God”.

Sati (widow burning) - a perversion of the scriptures, banned by law many decades ago - was the outcome of the belief that a woman cannot have an existence, or an identity, without her husband.

Out Of The Dark Ages? Not Yet…

It’s true that, in ancient times, a woman’s survival depended on her ability to attract a man who would provide for her. Today, however, women have many more options.

We no longer live in the dark ages, but thousands of years of evolution and cultural conditioning are proving difficult to eliminate overnight.

So, even in this enlightened day and age, you’ll find women all over the globe, who are desperate to find a man to “complete” them, and provide for them.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting a mate, someone you can spend a lifetime with. It can be wonderful to have someone to love, hold and cherish.

The problem arises when you start depending on your mate to help you heal your childhood wounds, and make you happy or whole. That’s your therapist/healer’s job, not his.

No one but you, has the power to make you happy. When you give that power over to someone else, when you look outside of yourself for love and acceptance, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment.

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Stupid Mistake #10: Making Him Responsible For Your Happiness

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Priya Florence Shah
		About the author:
		Priya Florence Shah is a single mother, entrepreneur and the editor of Naaree.com, India's online magazine for empowered women. She blogs on relationships, self-improvement and spirituality and internet marketing.
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