Shock, denial, anger, grief and intense pain – these are some of the emotions that grip you in turn or all at once if you have lost your spouse. After all, this comes the most difficult aspect of moving on.
Everyone tells you that you need to move on, and you know that you do. It takes immense courage and rationale to be able to say, “OK, life has to go on”, but it is possible with will power and the support of your family and friends.
If your husband provided for you and your family well enough that you don’t need to ever work again, you’re one of the lucky few.
However, for the majority of homemakers who have been out of the job market and do not have the means to manage without a steady income, life may seem overwhelming, emotionally and financially.
Chores, bills and the whole routine seem like an impossible mountain to climb. If you had a job before your husband passed away, then review your job situation and see if you want to carry on in the same position.
If it is something that will continue to be financially viable, and something that you want to continue doing, it makes things a little easier. Ask your employer for a break long enough for you to get back to your feet after the terrible loss.
If you were a homemaker when your husband passed away, then you need to seriously think about what you can do to make yourself financially independent.
Take stock of your investments and savings, and talk to a financial consultant about how to can put your money in low-risk instruments and draw out some of them for immediate need until you find a job.
If you had worked at some point in time before your husband’s death then contact previous employers or business associates and set up interviews.
Don’t do this at a time when you are still in denial of your husband’s passing, because you never know when reality will choose to rear its ugly head and reduce you to a bundle of nerves.
Do it only when you have gone through some grief counselling or therapy and accepted reality for what it is.
Take stock of your educational qualifications, and see if you need to enrol in a diploma course or something similar which will help you stay abreast of recent developments in the industry of your choice.
Take opinions and suggestions from your close friends and family as they have your best interests at heart. Sign up on job sites on the web, and refresh your resume.
Be active on social and professional networking sites such as Facebook and LinkedIn and stay in touch with prospective employers.
Don’t be afraid to go out there and network with people. It will be difficult in the beginning to even think of a semblance of social life, but remember that you need to be strong and get back on your feet again.
You need to support yourself and your kids. Don’t be dejected in case a couple of interviews don’t go as well as you expect.
Keep at it, and with will power and determination, you will be able to hold your head high and bounce back into life.
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